Another Monday

I think it is safe to say that I need structure and a schedule The weekends are always like mini vacations. On Friday evening, after working so hard I never got a real break, I stopped for some quick groceries for dinner. Down the health food isle I came across Plentils .. a chip made out of lentils which I had to try .. no extra ingredients, no maltodextrin... just some sea salt Friday evening I did some of the DVD's ... sun salutations and a section of the ballet barre... then I turned on the AC.. I also discovered brown rice bread ... no dairy, no eggs, no soy, no sugar, no gluten -- but it does have taste. Needless to say this is an apparent weakness, much as I deny it, since this bread, toasted with almond butter became Friday's dinner, Saturday and Sunday's breakfast ... Although I rose on time to go to spinning class.. even dressing for it ... the child woke up and I used that excuse not to go ... lovely. I did make the yoga class which was very much needed. Aside from this the only real exercise I did was the tank top arms workout on Sunday ... I really need to work on this weekend problem

Consistency is one of my problems. I can get into a groove eating, drinking water, and exercise. Routine seems to be what works for me. When I got off the routine I stop all positive change and lose all of my success. Now I need to create a new routine. At 53 its not easy; its frustrating to realize that I can no longer just jump out of bed and do anything for 50 minutes. Not easy but not impossible. I need to come up with a plan that I can do on my own (Did I mention that I cannot get out of bed in the morning unless someone is picking me up to go to the gym or is meeting me at the track? one of my flaws that I cannot seem to overcome.) At night, after a long day at work, and then feeding the spouse, I dont have the energy to clean the kitchen let alone the desire to exercise. I just want to lie down. I know ... I am great right now. I can plan and devise a schedule like no one else can. If I start today .. this is what I will doing every day for the next 12 weeks and wow .. just imagine ...but then I get home and get caught up .. and tomorrow never comes. And if timing and age are not enough to stop me dead in my tracks the weather this summer has been horrible. Steamrooms are more comfortatble than the world I live in. Even when the temp declines enough to warrant turning off the air conditioner awhile and opening up the windows, once I start on the treadmill or one of the DVD's I heat up way too quickly. I dont do well when I sweat THAT much. (The treadmill was assembled in the den. The only time I really feel like using it is in the evening. However, my husband, who bought the machine and chose its space cannot stand to listen to it while he is trying to watch TV.. so I dont use it.. ) When you put all of this together it is easy to see how hopeless it all it yet I am not giving up and am going to fight to amke this work. I have a birthday in 6 months and a graduation in nine. I intend for those pictures to be worth framing and not hiding. What is the plan? Food. I have been low to no carb for so long I really feel my body does not function with it. I have become so afraid of our meat and fish that I have pretty much sworn it off. I will have a bison burger. I will only eat beef if it is grass fed and chicken / been if there are no hormones / antibiotics. People .. you eat what your food eats!! I will only eat fish if it is wild and not much from the Atlantic. Its just not heathy (my opinion based upon my research.. I push my family only). For the next three weeks I am going to have a "smoothie" each morning and again at lunch. The ingredients Breakfast: pea protein powder, Chia seed, ground flax seed (keep in the freezer otherwise you are not getting any nutirents), kale, blueberries (or other berry) and almond milk or a mix or almond and coconut milk. Lunch: pea protein powder, blueberries (or other berry), and almond milk or a mix or almond and coconut milk. Kale maybe, however the machine in the office doesnt blend in the kale like my Vitamix. Dinner: garden salad with some avocado and beans; cooked garden vegetables (eggplant, chard, tomatoes, green peppers) I will be avoiding soy, corn, dairy, eggs, gluten. That kind of limits me. I am also going to avoid almond / cashew butter ( MY FAVORITE downfalls and am afraid I visit the jar too often) If I need to snack it will be cucumbers and hummus. I can also go through large quantities of this too so I need to write everything down. (If needed AND available. I can have 2 oz dark chocolate and no more than that. This is difficult since I will easily find an excuse to pass a bowl of dark chocolate all day ...its best to just say no) Water, water, and more water. I run hot and cold (so to speak). Some days I can easily inhale the recommended # ounces (50% of my body weight) and other days its 11 oclock and I still havent had a drop. Apparently I need to chart everything out in schedule format or its not happening. I let the day control me rather than me controlling the day. Exercise - it needs to become a prominent part of the schedule At home I have some equipment that I can use (Including a bowflex and a treadmill), some light weights, a Pilates chair, and a library of DVD's. You name the program, someone in my house has bought it, used it a bit and now it sits with all of the other DVD's. For the next three weeks I am going to use the Exhale Core Fusion DVDs alternating between the following four (in this order) Barre Basics Body Sculpt Pilates Plus Bootcamp These DVD's are divided into 10 minute increments. I will be happy successfully completely a 10 min segment in an evening - since I am comparing it to an evening where I had previously done nothing. If I keep this us - routinely - I should be able to add segments until I am doing 5 - 7 in a row. I will also be using the Arthritis Rx DVD nightly I hope to do some daily yoga alternating .... Abs Yoga 20 min program ( the long vinyasa on the weekend) Slim Calm Sexy Yoga Yoga Journal Beginner Yoga PM Yoga Beginner Ashtanga But here you see my dilemmna ... there are too many options and so lttle time .. If I alternate all of them am I going to get anything out of it ? should I just alternate 2 for the next three weeks and then choose a couple more? I also wish to get back to Spinning There is a class at the gym Tue / Thu 6 PM and Sat AM at 8.30 ... Lets start to see what I can do ... and I will let you know ... (If I get energetic then I can start sewing, knitting, etc.... ) _______________________________________________________________________________________ I am quickly wondering if this public forum will do wonders toward keeping me honest... and excuseless As I leave work I have consumed 64 oz of H20 and I am thrilled Breakfast went as planned Lunch was a salad with veggies and beans / lentils ( EVOO and Lemon Juice as a dressing ) So my evening meal will have to be the smoothie ... I wonder if that will get me exercising????

Day of reckoning

I have been on this roller coaster most of my life. Heavy child Anorexic in my late teens until .. well...lets just say I am recovering since I dont think I have ever truly gotten over my food and self image issues. I was scared when I had the babies. I was able to lose the weight easily after the first yet found it almost impossible after the second. I found myself 25 pounds heavier than I was used to. I looked good (healthy not skin and bones) but ... Then I turned 38, quit smoking, and fractured my back. An impossible tri-fector. I now find myself 53 and 171 pounds. I seem to default to this weight now which is great if I am a 6' male. However I am a 5'4 female and I want to weigh 121. Right now lets get me to 146. 25 pounds. Half the weight I want to lose. I was able to get doneunder 160 a little over a year ago due to constant vigilence and lots of exercise. Then I went back to school. Apparently, I cannot work full time, go to school, take care of a family AND take care of me. I got tired. Stopped going to spin class. Now I am out of school.. feeling sluggish all over, Two weeks ago I was 167.5 ..went on the diet and this afternoon the scale hit 171. This is why I am beginning this writing project to help me focus. I am doing something horribly wrong. I am also feeling my age since I took this last exercise vacation. Sluggish, achy, (arthritis? ) I need to turn this around immediately. I have a gym membership that I have not been using. I have more exercise DVD's than I can list. I love to buy them. But you need to use your tools and you need to use them consistently in order for them to work. I find that DVD's I was great at last year --even on this first try -- I can only use for 10 min or so. Is it me or the heat? I have to come up with a plan this evening and will commit to it hear. Till later